The Thing Below (2004)

Now I watched this under it's "Sea Ghost" guise and for a brief moment I thought that perhaps I had stumbled upon an alien with a really useful power... We start on a deep sea base where some excavations release said beastie who manages to get close to it's potential victims by metamorphosing into someone familiar before turning them into lunch! With this creature at large and peckish, it falls to "Capt. Jack" (Billy Warlock) and his motley crew to try and thwart it's intentions before they are all snack food. Now the film is awful, there is simply nothing at all redeeming about it. The acting and dialogue are dreadful; the attempts at horror are completely wrecked by some early "Stargate" style special effects - and there is even a full-on porn star who really does have a vicious tongue! Useful? Well just think how handy it would be if you could just get close to the folks you don't really like and then just gobble them up? Gone for ever and you don't even put on an ounce of body fat! This is television tosh and that it was made at all is testament to the fact that some people really do have more money than sense! Avoid unless you are seriously bored!